Log in

30 December 2016 @ 10:21 pm
Just like it was for everybody else, my 2016 sucked  

...which makes it ironic that I started the year talking about how even the look of those numbers felt promising to me. The prospect of having my novel completely revised and seeking publication by now was tangible... then I was literally and figuratively knocked off my path by two rear-end car accidents. I even had a dream last night that it happened again. I still have daily stomach issues because of gastritis, an illness often caused by extreme stress, which you can bet those accidents gave me. For months I couldn't accomplish a thing because I was in bed, in toe-curling pain. I couldn't get out of my body and imagine other worlds. It's regrettable, but there is still a positive side.

Getting sick forced me to have to take care of myself in ways I had been putting off. It forced me to have to "take out the trash". When I realized work didn't have my back, I quit. I got a new job that wants me to be okay and is very low stress. It's not anything I have to fume about once I'm home, that's for sure. I've met some new people I hit it off with, and guess what else?

One of them is a writer, with connections, who used to read manuscripts for a publishing company. I can tell she knows a lot, and she wants to help me! Once I have a manuscript ready, she has offered to read it -- again, she used to be paid to do this, but she wants to do it for me for free! AAAH!!! Of course I'm nervous, because she made sure to tell me she would offer criticism and I should be ready for it, but honestly, I am more than ready. With criticism comes insight into what it is I'm trying to do. It's actually very flattering when someone spends enough time trying to figure that out. At least, that is what genuine, sincere criticism is. It should make you feel that someone is in your corner, pep-talking you. One of my favorite pieces of feedback is still the lengthy email full of suggestions and observations that cloudsinvenice & R put together.

On that note, I should post it - it was lovely!

Anyhoo, what did I accomplish this year?

☆彡 Five full chapters of HT's rewrite, plus 2 1/2 that are on the way.
☆彡 What is now a 6pg story going nowhere about Jenna and I's fantasy realm
☆彡 Some paintings & concept art
☆彡 A really EPIC Jared Leto Joker cosplay

☆彡 A blog for that cosplay with 500+ followers

I mean, considering how sick I was, it's nice to say I've done those things. I really loved my blog, too. It was a journey and I got to learn more about costumes and makeup, and share what I learned with others. Maybe it turned out the Suicide Squad fandom went sour, but they can't come between me and the material. I try to see it that way. ;D

New Years resolutions... man... do I even want to remember what they were for this year? I probably didn't accomplish them.

Honestly, what I want (what I always want) is to have a draft of this manuscript I can finally submit and a website that corresponds. That's the dream. And I'd like to be happy painting, be happy doing more cosplay maybe. I'd like to take my J out into the real world and do photos. First, I'll just have to make some friends? lol I don't want to have any strict goals besides this novel, though, because it's more important I finish it than anything else. Rather go far with one thing that could start my career than make little bits of progress with all kinds of inconsequential things, like AIW fanfiction, which I'm sure I'll do sometimes for fun, but I'd never push myself. Not when time and energy is so precious. (Funny enough, doing silly side writing has helped me unlock my brain when I get stuck on parts of HT. I'll write for a bit about all of us arguing with Charles Dodgson and suddenly be able to ride through a HT scene that I wasn't finding the inspiration for.)

Okay, 2017. Get yo' ass over here.

Current Mood: tiredtired